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Towards the end of my shift this rn asked me to help her change a pt who's bed ridden. And we went to her, her bed was all soaked in urine, she had an ostomy bag that was full of gastric contents (she can't poop it goes straight from her intestines into the bag) sorry if that's tmi, and she's been lying in wet urine for the whole day. No one bothered to clean her or change her. And on top of that she had a stage 3 pressure ulcer located above her buttocks and lower back the size of a baseball and the skin has rotted away into the tissue and slight into the muscle. It is an ulcer from prolonged position and skin breakdown due to not being turned or readjusted. She was so thin and frail and she couldn't move by myself at all. And it wasn't covered. It was exposed. So that has been lying in the urine bed as well. It is so painful. Think of a burn that you have. That stings. Now imagine that 10x as bad. I was crying behind my mask and rubbing her back (upper back) and saying we're just cleaning you giving you clean sheets and putting medicine on your wound bc she was hurting and she got mad bc she thought we were hurting her on purpose bc of how painful it was and she started cursing and starting throwing out fists and we had to tell her to calm down and that we're not hurting her just cleaning her and covering her wound bc we don't want her to be dirty or it to be infected and lying in dirty soiled bedding. Afterwards I said to her do you feel better? You're nice and clean now and she said yes.

I was also taking care of alot of covid patients yesterday as well, getting their vitals, hanging Ivs, blood, Foley catheters whatever the other nurses needed on them. They were isolated in the makeshift crate like container rooms with the beeping of their heart monitors to let us know that they're still alive, the whooshing sounds of the ventilator machines with the tubes going down their lungs to keep the oxygen flowing into their lungs. They were covered in lines, from the heart monitor stickies on their chest to the IV lines on their arms to pulse and oxygen meters on their fingers and ears. They were all in comatose state and unresponsive. When I was in there with them I would speak to them and say hi, tell them what I was going to do to them and hold their hands for a brief moment or so just to give them comfort, even if they can't feel it. I also took care of a pregnant mom who couldn't breathe and was in her 3rd trimester, about 7 months pregnant. I took her to the bathroom and assisted her with everything, from pulling down her pants, holding her so she could pee, making sure she wiped and washed her hands and that she wouldn't fall or lose oxygen in there because I carried the oxygen tank in with her. Her mask and nasal o2 cannula that was in her nostrils to help her breathe kept falling off so I kept readjusting it for her behind her ears and her nose. If she had covid I'm sure I got it from her being in the close proximity I was with her and how long I was in that bathroom with her but you know what? I didn't care. At that moment my priority was that she didn't fall on or off that toilet, crack her head open, fall on her baby in her belly and that she didn't lose oxygen and pass out in there and that I made sure she would make it back to her bed. I went home and cried. It was so hard. The world has no idea.


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